Monday, March 26, 2012

ask lolly

It's time for another edition of
"Dear Lolly"


**I actually found this question in a
"Your relationship questions answered" column in a women's magazine.
And as you will soon find out, based on MY reply,
I didn't even bother to read what the columnist's answer was.
Heee.


Q:
I lost my job in the fall, and I've been squeaking by financially,
just barely covering my bills and paying rent.
My mom is putting a lot of pressure on me to move back home to
save money,
but I'm to old to live with my mother...I'm 30.
Help!


My dear jobless friend,
First of all,
you're 30 years old, which is...adorable.
But honey,
at 30, you don't have the sense God gave a fence post.
So let me explain what your mother's offer really means:

Breakfast in bed every morning.
Shopping every day.
A generous allowance for merely unloading the dishwasher once a week.
And being tucked into bed every single night,
complete with a snack and a new magazine.

You see,
once you and your siblings all moved out,
your mother morphed into an entire new creature.
And moving back home would enable you to full reap the full benefits of that.

It's the beautiful circle of life.

So my advice to you is to run, don't walk...RUN to your mother's house.

You will thank me later.

Or something like that.

Love,
Lolly

4 comments:

Tesseraemum said...

Oh My Word! Give me this mother's address. I don't want to move in! I just need a couple of days. Make that a week!
My mom expects this kind of treatment herself. Of all the nerve!!! Sheri

Faye Verquer said...

LOVE IT!!! That is awesome advice!

Holly said...

Oh, amen. Preach it, sister!

Anonymous said...

From one fairly old (for living with mom) college student living with her mother due to similar circumstances - RUN home immediately! You have no idea how much it helps!

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